The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down. (Proverbs 14:1 ESV)

I have been married over thirty years. I work hard to honor and serve my husband – meeting his needs, keeping our home, homeschooling our children. From appearances only, I may look like an ideal wife.

But through the years, I have also been defensive and quarrelsome. Rather than building up my home and family, I have torn it down. So worried about being taken advantage of, or submitting my will (frowned upon by our current society), I’ve stood my ground, challenged decisions, and undermined authority. Oh Lord, have mercy. What an example I’ve given my children on how not to behave in marriage.

Reading my confession here, you may rise up and defend me saying, “What about your husband, I bet he’s not perfect.”

There are plenty of verses in the Bible regarding how men and husbands are to behave, but today’s verse is speaking to women.

Everyday, we, women, respond with words and behaviors which either encourage and in turn build up our husband and homes, or we chip away at them, brick by brick. We can regard our situations with gratitude or discontent. We can choose to forgive and overlook offenses, or we can hold them close and allow bitterness to grow.

We have control over our words and our attitudes – and promises from God to help us when we feel we can’t. (Philippians 4:13 ESV)

So, what will it be today?